Just ok

I am a pretty average person. I think it is accurate to say that I have never been great at anything, but average at a lot of things.  While I was growing up I participated in quite a few different sports.  I enjoyed all of them, was pretty good at some of them, but excelled at none of them.  Why?  Is there something inside of us that can trigger greatness, or is it a simple matter of being born with the ability to be great? 

It seems at least for me, that I have so many things calling for my attention and time that no matter what I cannot devote enough energy to be great so I settle for average. 

For as long as I can remember I have struggled with my weight. I have ran, I have p90x'd, I have t25'd, I have weight watchered, but none of them have stuck. So I live my life carrying 30-40 pounds more that I would like.  I kind of watch what I eat to counter act my discipline to exercise.    People talk about how we should just live ourselves and be happy. Be comfortable in our own skin they say.  I'm not comfortable in my own skin. I don't like having "dad bod", but evidently it doesn't bother me enough to flip that switch in my brain yet.

I try to be a great teacher, I am still new at it, so I am learning as I go. To be great requires countless hours of preparation and practice.  I will get there...someday.   I do love teaching, and I love the daily interaction with my students, so I am hopeful that I will get there one day. 

I'm not a very good parent. I love my kids to death. I would do anything for them. However, as they grow older I cam see that I missed the boat in so many places.  I see their struggles and failures as a direct reflection on my abilities as a parent.

This was a bit of a downer of a post today, but it is what has been on my mind this morning.

Don't sweat the small stuff

I am quickly learning that sometimes it does not pay to be nice to your students.   In my room I run a pretty loose ship.   I love to nurture a playful relationship with my students.  I keep candy in my room and often will give some to students when it looks like they are having a rough day or as a reward for their efforts.  Unfortunately, I have some students that feel entitled.  I have had to crack down on a group of students that think nothing of coming into my classroom and help themselves to the candy, sometimes even grabbing handfuls.    Playful redirections have not helped them to get the hint.  These same students also think that it is ok to come into my classroom during lunch (my time) and go crazy putting things on the wall and what not.  After telling them several times that they need to respect me and my classroom I have had to resort to other tactics.  Today I locked my drawers that I keep the candy in, and locked my room during lunch.   When they asked why did that, I explained to them that I need to teach them that letting them have candy and to hang in my room are privileges, not rights.  I told them that I need a couple of days without them in their causing havoc.  I felt bad, but I felt it was necessary.

Today I also had some excitement in my class.  I have let my students choose their own seats and sit where they want for the first couple of weeks of the term so they could find neighbors that they would be able to work with.  On Tuesday, I passed around a seating chart and asked the students to write their name in it so I could use it to take roll from now on.   At the end of class a student came up and made a change because some other students had crossed our their names in their seats and put them somewhere else.  I hadn't thought any more about it since then.  So today, at the beginning of class I heard some talking then heard one student tell another "If you don't get out of my seat right now I'm going to slap your face".   TRIGGER  I quickly made my way over to figure out what was going on.  I told them that they could figure out a peaceful resolution or I would assign them seats away from their friends around the classroom.  Magically they had it worked out within couple of minutes.

It is never a dull moment.  I love teaching, and I love my students.   I try to show them that I understand them and they are always welcome.  I have such a divers group of kids that it makes every day a new adventure.  I may not always like the meetings and bureaucratic  hoops that I have to hope through, but I am blessed to have the opportunities that I do.   There are students that I honestly look forward to seeing each class period.

The Solitude of Sunday Morning Grading

I’m sure that most teachers will agree, grading is one of the least favorite parts of the job.   I have found that if I grade once a week and get everything caught up on that day it is fair for me as well as my students.  They all know that every Sunday their grades will be caught up.  I chose Sunday mornings because I can get up early when the house is still quiet and just go into my office.  I don’t have to worry about t distractions and don’t feel like I am keeping my self secluded from my family.

One of biggest challenges I have though is keeping myself focused.  I have so many “tabs” open in my brain, I have to keep closing them so I can complete the task at hand.    For whatever reason, I am a list keeping kind of guy.  I write lists down of what I need to accomplish, then I can check them off as I finish them.  I am not sure if I started doing it just so I can feel good about myself because I am actually getting something done or because I forget everything that is not written down.   Although, sometimes I cheat and write something down on my list and check it off even after it is done.  For instance, today’s blog entry was not on my list, but it just came to mind.   So, I just wrote it down so I can check it off. 

Who am I?

I have decided that I am in a relatively unique position to share my thoughts from my life.  My name is Scott Johnson; I am a 47-year-old divorced single dad, teacher living in Utah.  I am dad to four children.   My oldest daughter is 23 and is married, I have a son that is 20 that is currently working full time, but plans on returning to college and pursuing a fire science degree and an EMT certification, I have another son that is 17 and is working full time and attending a technical school to earn his CNA certification.  Finally, my youngest daughter is a freshman.

I was married for about 12 years before filing for divorce.  I have always had custody of my children since day 1.   

I am currently in my 3^rd year of Teaching at a Utah County High School.  I teach Business and Computer classes and also co advise our DECA and FBLA clubs at school. 

My 85 year old father and us all live together.  My mother passed away several years ago and my dad has MS and is not able to drive. 

I was born and raised in Orange County, California where I lived up until 1992 when I got married.  We moved to Utah for good around 2002 and now it is home.